Santa doesn't come to our house

Wait! Let me explain!

My husband’s family growing up didn’t do the whole Santa thing. He knew who Santa was, of course, but Santa didn’t bring the gifts on Christmas morning. Aside from the whole “Christmas is about Jesus, not Santa” thing, his parents felt that saying that ‘Santa’ brought the gifts wasn’t fair to the people (usually grandparents) who had actually given them. The kids knew about Santa, but he just wasn’t a part of their Christmas morning.

We decided to take the same route with our kids. For all the reasons my in-laws did, but also because we hate the idea of lying to our kids. When the kids ask about Santa, we tell them the story of Santa, we read Christmas books and we have a few Santa ornaments hanging on the tree. (We never say “Santa is not real” because he was real. But mostly because I would not want her to repeat that to another kid!)

We basically say in our house, we celebrate Jesus, not Santa. And our kids have always been totally cool with it. Well, they are four and five, so its not like they know the difference yet!

But a few days ago, our five-year-old asked me, “Are these Christmas stockings bad because they have Santa on them?”

So now what do we do? This could get to be a problem. I would never want her to tell another child that Santa is not real or that Santa is bad. I don’t want her to be that kid. (Remember that kid in first grade who told everyone else that he found out that Santa wasn’t real? And then you ran home to your mom and asked her if it was true? And she assured you it wasn’t, but you still waited up all Christmas Eve because you weren’t sure?)

How can I keep her from ruining another kid's Christmas?

All I can think of is to begin talking about how every family has different holiday traditions. Everyone celebrates Christmas a little differently. Some cultures have Santa, some don’t. Some people don’t even celebrate Christmas - we’ve started talking about Hanukkah, Ramadan and Kwanzaa, and I’m sure she’ll be learning more about those being in public school. I hope this will help her understand that what we do in our family may be different from other people, but it’s not necessarily right or wrong. I want her to share about our traditions, but not to feel self-conscious or – worse – self-righteous.

I want her to be proud of our family and what we do. Even if its different.

This is an original post to Philly Moms Blog.  Melissa also blogs on her personal blog, Girlymama.