On Wedding Bands, Respect, and Pregnancy
Before we were newlyweds, I expressed to my husband, "I have no respect for the wives of men who don't wear wedding bands." It was a simple comment. Sort of a test, because a friend didn't wear one. Without even a question, my husband agreed. Phew.
Shiny new rings to get used to, we were married later that year. And all was well. While at first the wedding band proved uncomfortable, it didn't take long for it to be something no longer of concern. On our six-month anniversary, he came home and draped his left arm over my shoulder. Bandless. While out that night at happy hour, he tossed a snowball and the platinum ring went with it. (He's a lefty). I've been told he never went into the bar except to report it missing. Instead, he searched for hours in the parking lot and in the snowbanks. The next day he returned with a metal detector to no avail. We filed with Visa, but, apparently, throwing something isn't covered under their warranty policy.
About 4 weeks later I bought him a new ring. White gold this time. And he wore it, again with a little adjustment to the new band, until this fall when, while raking leaves, it fell off. Again, we searched. This time not through the snow, but through the piles of cold leaves. After a few weeks of hopeless searching, he ventured to the jewelry store for his 3rd ring. This time a little bigger, a bit more snug. He told me it was important to him to have a ring on when he was out with clients, with family, with friends. Most important, he said, it mattered to him because he remembered my respect comment of 9 years ago.
Its a double-edged sword, though, isn't it? Because here I am, 37 weeks pregnant, trying not to suffocate my veins by squeezing into my ring. I finally gave out and switched to a slightly bigger ring. But even that is getting tight. I keep glancing at my left hand, wondering just how he'll feel if I take off my ring? Will he feel disrespected? Will he even care?
This is an original Philadelphia Moms Blog post. Julie also blogs at Just Precious.
